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i 2.40-ed home today since i had such bad cramps that i wanted to die. ate sum meds fell aslp and went to music fest when i felt better. it was really nice. lotsa hot bods on show i must say. i hope the cramps dont last until tml if not i shall have to make a mental note to not drink so much if im even drinking at all, since panadol n alcohol dont mix. oh wells. we'll see about tml but i have a bad feeling.

went for my usual sat nite dinner with my sis yest. ate jap food at orchard.i think im beginning to appreciate jap food more now. yays. since there were fashion shows outside taka, i saw like soo many models walking arnd. omg la they have like freaking gd figures. was practically drolling all the way to heeren. heh. found out fr my sis's fren tt the sg police shut down a gay party by this organisation called fridae. tt's really sad. not tt i wld go anyway but still. its kinda stupid why we, a so called advanced and developed society wld have such backward views! and so our dear PM says tt they did it becoz singaporeans are still conservative. i dun think tt shld be a reason. so are we gg to just use this excuse whenever a gay event is cancelled? the obvious solution is education. ive realised tt gay ppl are EVERYWHERE. so by making em uncontented sg is really gg to lose its competitive edge over other countries. so the govt shld just stop fucking telling us tt we have to be more creative to make sg vibrant etc, when they are the ones driving such talents away!

i just watched V for Vendette today. it really great. had so many serious and real themes! from liberation to homosexuals to surpression. the movie really gets u thinking about how the world works and how fucked up we really are. not tt i didnt noe tt b4 just tt it made it clearer. lol. it was touching at the same time too. cried like soo many times. maybe it was becoz of the volatile mood i was already in.

Here's what i read on a website:
A group of conservative Christian meteorologists today announced plans to eliminate rainbows from the earth’s atmosphere. At a press conference following a White House luncheon with President Bush, lead scientist Bret Banger told reporters that his organization, Climatologists For Christ, had declared open season on the multi-colored spectrums of light as part of their commitment to eradicating “the homosexual lifestyle and all weather patterns that reflect it.”

The rainbow flag was adopted by gay rights activists to represent diversity in the gay community during the early 1980s, when gays and lesbians were too busy battling the Reagan Administration’s homophobia and discriminatory AIDS policies to come with a better idea.

Because rainbows are composed of curved spectrums of light that become visibile only when the sun’s light passes through prism-like raindrops during a rain shower, Climatologists for Christ are focusing their efforts on ending all forms of rain.

When reporters questioned how the earth would survive without rainfall, Banger fired back, “The love of God will keep us moist!”

Hilarious issnt it?

oh great ive fallen from 3rd to 7th for shot put even tho ive thrown my personal best since last year! hrmph. cant believe i lost to a big sized butch. but i must admit, she really looks scary. i dunno why im so sacred of butches la, they just look like they wanna punch me any moment. yikes. i'll prob run screaming away. seesh i may look tuff but then i think i'll be the 1st to run. ahaha i have to be braver!

decided not to go out with my sis tonite, wanted to save $$ aft i realized tt ive been spending alot this mth. so settled at home with a cup of baileys with star shaped ice. ah.. yummy. been looking at sum website for inspirations for interesting piercings tt im considering getting aft A's or when i stop trg. 2 MORE MONTHS! woohoo. prob get a helix done 1st. then maybe aft A's im considering adding more on my ears or eyebrown or belly.if i get more on the ears i think i'll have to close the more ordinary ones tt i have already, if not my ears will seem overloaded!ahh.. i cant wait!=) hopfully i wont get chased out of the hse or sumthing

today i had a talk with god. or rather i was doing most if not all the talking. so i asked him, why bother making mankind when once we are brought into this world, some of us already have a death sentence. just imagine the number of babies sricken with aids not to mention the no of baby girls which are killed and dumped in china just because they arnt seen as useful to the family. whats the point in being born if ure gg to die soon afterwards anyway rite? when ure first feelings are ones of pain? worse still than that, u live life, slog through everything and then die. thats sad man. read this book today which said happiness comes in rations. when u have it ure worrying about the time tt it will leave u so much so tt u cant enjoy it. and when ure happy, u feel like ure depriving sumone of their own happiness. interesting way of seeing things huh. and like all my conversations with god, he nv talks back. so much so tt its more like therepy for me. always having a person up there to whine to, except tt he doesnt do anything back. there are sum answers tt ive been waiting for a long time to be answered. like for one, why isnt the world fair? oh yeah, if i knew i wldnt be here now right.

u noe its seriously fucking irritating when everyone around u is happy and ure not. so u TRY to be happy. TRY to be supportive. TRY to be enthusiastic, even when u really feel like not giving a damn anymore. all this coz u want to be a good friend and want to care. blah blah blah. oh yay! my life's just great. happy happy happy! oh just fuck it. pass me and ice cold beer and let me live it out. i guess thats why people have their poisons. be it alcohol, cigs or drugs. makes life just a lil more bearable

great just great. when im already feeling like shit, i find out tt my freaking ipod is giving my problems. needa send it for servicing. hopefully i'll have sum time tml aft my st john's island trip. hope i dun get seasick or sumthing. and the next bad thing of the day, dana's dead. dana's one of my fave characters on the l word together with the ever funny alice. not to mention the one with the cute face hot bod and great personality. sigh all good things always come to an end. now i dun feel like watching l word anymore =(

well..went to acsi for nth. 1 1/2 hrs wasted. i have a totally new haircut. went to the salon tt shuwen recommended. the hairstylist was quite hot. so i just fell asleep. next thing i knew, i woke up with 2cm worth of fringe left. and its all equal length summore. at 1st look i tot the hairstyle sucked but aft a while it looked kinda okaayy i guess. so much for the long fringe tt i was keeping.
met simone for dinner. gave her the present tt amanda and i shared. omg i think its super cool lar, its a new wife vodoo doll, complete with 10 pins and 25 actions like:'lets have sex and lets have sex again' so basically u push the pin into the part tt indicates wad u want her to do. cool huh? had dinner at liquid kitchen. nice place to chill out i think, foods good, and drinks shld be alrite altho i only settled for a glass of tiger[being my usual ahpek self] managed to have such a long and fruitful talk. really felt like old times again... =) *gets all warm and fuzzy*
aft tt proceeded to bedok for a bit of pool. all in all it was a nice end to a day which started off badly.
oh btw i tried my first cigarette already. was out with my sis and her frens,so since i hadnt tried smoking b4 they gave me one. hmm.. actually it wasnt all tt bad. no coughing like everyone said. i guess its alrite to have a smoke once in a while but there's a fine line btw tt and addiction. not a risk i think im willing to take

Tuesday Morning

10:03 on a Tuesday morning
In the fall of an American dream
A man is doing what he knows is right
On flight 93

Loved his mom and he loved his dad
Loved his home and he loved his man
But on that bloody Tuesday morning
He died and American

Now you cannot change this
You can't erase this
You can't pretend this is not the truth

Even though he could not marry
Or teach your children in our schools
Because who he wants to love
Is breaking your God's rules

He stood up on a Tuesday Morning
In the terror he was brave
And he made his choice and without a doubt
A hundred lives he must have saved

And the things you might take for granted
Your inalienable rights
Some might choose to deny him
Even though he gave his life

Can you live with yourself in the land of the free
And make him less of a hero than the other three
Well it might begin to change ya
In a field in Pennsylvania

Stand up America
Hear the bell now as it tolls
Wake up America
It's Tuesday Morning
Let's roll

when i heard this song i cried. maybe it was becoz of the slighty disturbed/sulky mood i was already in. its about a gay man who saved thusands of lives by overpowering the hijackers and crashing the plane into a field instead of a populated area during 9/11. touching eh.

Your Five Factor Personality Profile

Extroversion: You have medium extroversion. You're not the life of the party, but you do show up for the party. Sometimes you are full of energy and open to new social experiences. But you also need to hibernate and enjoy your "down time." Conscientiousness: You have low conscientiousness. Impulsive and off the wall, you don't take life too seriously. Unfortunately, you sometimes end up regretting your snap decisions. Overall, you tend to lack focus, and it's difficult for you to get important things done. Agreeableness: You have medium agreeableness. You're generally a friendly and trusting person. But you also have a healthy dose of cynicism. You get along well with others, as long as they play fair. Neuroticism: You have high neuroticism. It's easy for you to feel shaken, worried, or depressed. You often worry, and your worries prevent you from living life fully. You tend to be emotionally reactive and moody. Your either flying very high or feeling very low. Openness to experience: Your openness to new experiences is medium. You are generally broad minded when it come to new things. But if something crosses a moral line, there's no way you'll approve of it. You are suspicious of anything too wacky, though you do still consider creativity a virtue.

You possess a very particular type of honesty that's straightforward and compassionate -- and you shouldn't ever let anyone tell you it's not the right way to be. Especially not at this particular moment in time. Whatever comes up now will call for someone with guts, firmness and compassion -- someone who can boldly say what no one has said before, in an inimitable, inarguably honest way. That would be you. Go right ahead and step in.
hmm... interesting huh..

felt uneasy n disturbed thru out sch today. i just had to get out.

humans sure are special. we are like the only species tt can make as well as take our own lives. its kinda scary that there isnt really much diff bet us and god in that sense. if theres one thing tt ive learnt from the incident its that life is so fragile. one decision is all u need to end it all. its also so scary how ure actions might just be the spark needed to cause sumone to take their lives. makes u think twice about ure actions. well i think commiting suicide is ironically kinda brave yet cowardly. maybe if it wasnt a sin or if it wasnt pain i would have done it about 3 yrs ago? things then wernt working out for me and the world was fucked up. im glad its over altho the world is still fucked up. at least ive seen the brighter side of things.=) well tt's far from saying tt im happy 24/7 nowadays. lets just say im more uh.. enlightened? aha
on a lighter note. i had my interview today for the geog thing. it was really stupid talking str8 into a camera and into an oddly shaped microphone. not to mention gesture it sum imaginary object and pretending to take notes in the HOT sun. all these with just 1 hr of sleep! watched brokeback and gia with the gang together with my fave beer, bacardi and snacks. it was kinda weird watching all the sex scenes with em. wonder if it as like tt the last time i saw gia with my frens... *shudders at thought*

okay was totally unprepared for chem. but was forced to take it anyway, in lt5 with only brandon's soccer socks to insulate my freezing arms. great. aft that proceeded for lunch and to town for sum shopping. saw sum good stuff but not really sure yet. i want new clothes, acessories, perfume and a bag. oh man. there goes another big chunk of my savings again. had a looonnngg talk with eric and weiling at taka. think we sat there for like 1 hrs plus. conclusion we're lonely ppl. ahaha. and i prob came to realize that certain events in ure life can shape u so much tt it changes ure whole insight to an issue. oh wells.

hmm wells i got back my chinese ao results today. i was sooo nervous i took a cab from home to sch to meet brandon to get the results tog. considering that its supp to be around hcl standard i did okay lar. got a B4 and a pass in oral. wells i always knew i speak chinese like a banana. oh btw i saw this super attractive girl while out at dinner just now. shes not wad u wld call chio, more like hmm cool? not butch yet not tt femme too.sumhow i felt like i saw her sumwhere b4. may lightning strike me if i like a butch. in a totally unrelated note, i had so much trouble sleeping last nite. was thinking about sum stuff and a moment kept replaying itself in my mind. u noe how it is with special moments,u wish it cld be replayed over and over again. =) oh wells but it wont in reality of coz and reality is wad matters anyway. so with just 3 hrs slp i woke up and mugged for geog. ended up like a zombie during the freakin hard geog paper. got so confused by the graphs! thats the most no. of lines i ever saw on a x and y axis